While orgasms provide the most profound experience of satisfaction that any human, whether male or female, can experience, many women never reach orgasm. Of those below 25, only about a quarter do.

This is, of course, tragic. Orgasms are the essence of being alive, and there is no substitute whatsoever. If I'd have to choose between losing my capability of orgasm and losing a leg, I'd let my a leg go. Without the capability to experience orgasms, I wouldn't know what I'm alive for.

But not only women suffer when they do not achieve orgasm. Their partners suffer, too. It is an essential element of self-fulfillment for a man to bring his woman to an orgasm. A real one, not a faked one. It's so disappointing for a man to not be capable to bring a woman he loves to an orgasm that many men, including me, would happily trade a hunded of their own orgasms for a single orgasm of the anorgasmic female partner.

But none of these trade-offs are necessary. Every woman can have climaxes.

Most women who do not have orgasms do not have them because they are with the wrong man. A man who may be a woman's choice for a lifelong partner or husband may not be the right one to achieve sexual satisfaction. Anyway, most females in non-Wesgtern countries choose husbands for other qualities than sexual attractiveness.

Because achieving orgasm is regarded as more important in Western than Oriental cultures, Western men usually have better awareness of the lovemaking techniques that are suitable to bring a female partner to a climax. On the contrary, the love-making techniques of many Asian men are lacking.

It may also be that a man's genitals are not large enough, or that he has a childish character which is sexually not arousing for the woman. Young women will have orgasms easier when they are with a man who is at least in his 30s.

If all other means fail, there even is a prescription medication that statistically increases the likelyhood of women having climaxes. But female climaxes are not among the official indications of the drug, so most physicians do not know about it.

Anyway, the value of the drug is not to be overestimated. A man with the right qualities, who is literate about the female orgasm, is more important.

Version 3.2, November 2003

There really is just one reason why we may sensibly choose to be alive rather than dead - the moments during sexual intercourse when we forget the senselessness of existence because we are inundated in an ocean of sexual desire and satisfaction.

Feuilleton writers who lament the decline of the West because pharmaceutical companies focus part of their attention on developing lifestyle drugs such as Viagra instead of concentrating on finding remedies for some strange diseases, are essentially wrong. For satisfying sex really is of central relevance.

Substitute satisfaction is no substitute for satisfaction. All entertainment is just a waste of time.

Sexual intercourse is not entertainment. It's a deeply philosophical undertaking. During the moment of orgasm we intuitively know more about life than can be learned from hours of meditation or the digestion of philosophical tomes.

Any living human being is just a lump of molecular compounds, a result of the chemical characteristics of the carbon atom. We are victims of nature, tricked into existence by evolution. Consciousness is a faux pas of evolution, as consciousness can only result in the revelation that it would be better never to have been born.

However, the idea of suicide is self-defeating, as the rules of evolution do not only apply to the species but also in the realm of ideas. Any school of thought advocating suicide logically cannot prevail on the face of the earth, as its disciples were to disappear by own choice.

As each of us is just a simmering biochemical soup, we are subject to specific spicing. To avoid boiling over, the spicing obviously has to be done gently. Lifestyle drugs are a good idea, but they have to be applied carefully.

Nevertheless, to get the right taste for life is not only a matter of metaphysics but also of pharmacology. For many men, Viagra is philosophically more relevant than Spinoza.

Death

Apart from good sex, a gentle death really is the only other legitimate concern in life. All other matters are second-rate topics.

I do not advocate suicide. The neurological wiring of our minds makes it very difficult to reach a decision to commit suicide. This doesn't mean that we would be glad to be alive. For every ordinary person, the potential for suffering is so much greater than the potential for joy, that in general, it would be better never to have been born.

The conclusion that it would be better not to have been born is not identical with a decision to commit suicide, at least not for as long as we are healthy.

Most people make too few preparations for the most important event in life, which is the cessation of life. This includes the common attitude of not even thinking about death. We should discuss death once we are capable to reason, but not on the basis of those religions that attempt reasoning death away with promises of an eternal life in paradise.

Death is a very individual end of a personality, and there is nothing of what we consider our ego that would survive the moment of a person's physical death. It is not logically valid to say that, while the eternal life of a person's soul cannot be scientifically proven, it can also not be proven that there is no such eternal life of a person's soul. The probability that a nothing will not leave traces is much greater than the probability that a something will not leave traces. Therefore, if there are no traces, it is reasonable to consider a nothing, rather than a something.

While it is irrelevant for the individual what happens when he is dead, the event of dying is of utmost importance to an individual life. Some authors, such as Timothy Leary, have proclaimed dying the ultimate experience in life, an event that brings enlightenment and can be spent in joy (and not just by making a show out of it).

But dying can be sheer horror. And the probability that it will be horror rather than joy is so much greater that, thank you, we opt for a rather neutral setting. Dying in one's sleep, for example.

European and American men who come to Asia for sexual gratifications typically have little awareness of the Asian hierarchy of sexual market value, and of how deeply ingrained it is in Asian societies. Much more than in Europe or North America, sexual market value in Asia depends on factors other than beauty in women and age in men.

For women, a major aspect is sexual freshness. Throughout Asia, the highest sexual market value is attached to virgins from age 15, who are living with their parents and so far have only gone to school. In many Asian societies, their sexual market value is so high that they are normally available only to young men who are willing to go for a marriage, supported by both families.

As girls grow older, their sexual market value declines, even if the keep on staying with their parents (and remain virgins).

In comparison to 18-year olds who go to school and live with their parents, 18-year olds who no longer go to school, but work, or those who live in apartments in big cities, whether they work or go to school, have a lower sexual market value, as their freshness is questionable.

There is a very definite fall in the sexual market value of women who have been married and now are divorced or widows. And there again is a steep decline when they have given birth.

But among these, those who have work and an orderly income are still regarded higher than those who have no job, and whose only choice is to rely on finding a man to help make ends meet.

Prostitutes anywhere in Asia have the lowest sexual market value, though those whose virginity is on the block can ask for a high price once. It only takes a few weeks for their sexual market value to drop sharply.

Obviously, younger prostitutes get more customers, and ask for higher prices, but prostitutes are prostitutes, and even just as girlfriends (not talking about wives), their sexual market value is at the bottom of the scale.

Now enter Western men into the equation. In Western societies, especially in Europe, the sexual market value of women is less hierarchical. What counts in Europe is a beautiful face, and a sexy body. The age of a woman plays less a role, and as long as she doesn't have an infectious disease from it, it matters less how promiscuous she has been.

Furthermore, Europeans typically think that in an ideal match, the woman is some two to seven years younger than the man. This means that even women in their forties can still expect a sexual partnership if they aim at men in their fifties, and they could even end up with a reasonably wealthy one.

You'll have to look for a long time in Asia to find a rich man in his fifties marrying a woman in her forties. Rich Asian men in their fifties will marry young women in their twenties.

For in Asia, not only does the sexual market value of women (but not of men) relate strongly to their age and the degree of sexual inexperience; the sexual market value of men also is often determined simply by his economic status. For this reason alone, older European men will always find their sexual market value increased if they move to Asia, while older Asian women always experience an increase in sexual market value when they move to a Western country.

Divorced Asian women in their forties, when they stay in Asia, have either made their luck previously and then can be with a man who values the opportunity to marry a rich woman, or they will have to be content with a low-class male, or they stay unattached.

In a number of Asian countries with comparatively high divorce rates, Western men have a very easy time making live-in arrangements with local women... who all are divorcees, or widows, or have otherwise (been) separated from their husbands.

Western men in partnerships with local women in these countries often have the wrong impression that it is rather accidental that their women have been in previous marriages, and they think that in principle, they could have found single girls or women, too. But they are wrong: in these countries, where they can easily find a divorcee as partner, they would have a very hard time, indeed, to qualify for a previously unmarried woman.

I don't mind seeing other Western men with local divorcees, or even wit ex-prostitutes. But my personal choice, definitely, are young women who have not been previously married.

Yes, one can go for previously unmarried women in Asia (who definitely are not prostitutes), if one knows where to go to. The member area provides definite information about what to realistically aim for in different countries.