Anybody who cares to review the non-fiction literature on sexual relationships of the past few years, or even the past few decades, especially the literature from different parts of the world, or just the literature from social environments that are different from one's own social environment, arrives at a simple conclusion: Most of what is written, simply is wrong.

Some sources are just outdated, and they give the feel of being outdated already through the antiquated English that is used. But it doesn't stop there. Even contemporary sources, and even scientific sources usually do not reflect what each of us has learned on some very essential sexual questions.

What do women want? What do men want? What are the best sexual strategies? What should I be, how should I present myself, what can I do to have optimal sexual opportunities (or, land the best gal or the best guy).

Why do so many sources that we may consult get things so wrong?

The point is simply: there is so much variety among different social environments, that whatever the rules for successful mating might be in one environment, chances are they won't apply to another one. And the more pluralistic today's societies become, the greater the difference between the "styles" that are rewarded by the best sexual opportunities.

But while there are differences, there are also similarities. It's just that one has to define to which environment different rules apply.

Southeast Asian societies, by and large, are not as pluralistic as European societies. But in between Asian societies, the differences are much more pronounced than in between European societies. This is not just the case for such macro-cultural aspects such as language, script, religion, and form of governments.

The modes of sexual conduct also vary greatly, and with it, the settings in which Western men will best score sexually.

I have lived in Southeast Asia for several years, I have traveled to, and researched for sexual opportunities, all except Brunei.

In every Southeast Asian country, I have friends who have chosen their particular country because they are convinced that for sexual relationships, the country they have chosen is best.

But they are just optimally adapted to one country. And the modes that work best in Thailand are completely wrong for Indonesia, and if you want to find in China what you have in Cambodia, you will be very disappointed.

The differences among the countries in Southeast Asia are fundamental. But you can have satisfying sexual relationships in each of them. Provided you know what to look for, and provided you don't look for the wrong thing in the wrong country.

Adapting to a specific country can take many months. When those who have previously adapted to one Asian country move to another one, they will invariably try the same patterns that worked so well in the previous country...and fail miserably. Unless they have proper guidance.

The "sexual opportunities" member section does provide such guidance. And in addition to articles that provide proper insight, members are encouraged to communicate with me directly by email. The information people are looking for often is very particular.

Some people try to find answers by searching on the Internet. The short-coming of this approach is that many people who publish their hints on the web know just one country. There is, to the best of my knowledge, no other website apart from mine, that would compare Southeast Asian countries among each other for their prospects of sexual exploits.

Version 1.0, July 2007

Part 2 of this article deals with what many reader may consider an entirely odd or academic topic: what is the better sexual landscape? A world of many small countries, or one of large countries?

I assume that many readers may not just consider the question odd or academic, but, furthermore, doubt that there is a correlation at all between whether love affairs for foreign men are good, and the size of countries.

Let me assure you: there is. The size of a country may not be the single most important factor when we try to assess the potential a place holds for sexual adventures. But nevertheless, it is an aspect to consider.

The one rule that I have found to apply throughout the world is that if you, as a male seeking a female, aim for youth and beauty, then you are better off in small towns than in big cities. And the bigger the city, the worse in comparison to small towns.

It is clear why it must be that way. The bigger the city, the greater the competition.

It is a particularity of the female mind that girls and women always seek one of the best men in their vicinity. He doesn' have to be the best in their vicinity. Just one of those they consider the best, which is a rather exclusive club.

They do not seek one of the best men in absolute terms. Just one of the best in what they consider their wider environment.

It is also important to understand that they do not just seek a man of the top 10 percent or so, as it may be cited even in the scientific literature.

They seek not a relative number but an absolute one... about as many as they can consider viable alternatives. And the environment may not just be the real world but can also include the virtual world.

If their environment has a limited population, let's say 20,000, they will seek one of maybe 30 to 50 males. But when their environment has some 200,000 people, they will not seek one of 300 to 500 males, but still one of maybe 30 to 50.

The trick, as for love and geographical location, is to be somewhere where you are within this group of 30 to 50 sought after males for as many females as possible.

This popularity benchmark will vary greatly, depending in which country or society you base yourself. It will also be influenced by whether you base yourself in a big city, or in a small town.

A densely populated vincinity which also has cental functions will only benefit those men who have the highest sexual market value.

It's easy arithmetics. Among 5000 men, it easier to be among the top 30 to 50 than among 500,000 men.

Of course, in locations where tens of thousands of young women consider a limited number of males, as ideal potential partners for a serious relationship, most will have to settle for less or stay alone, even if what is considered the top 30 to 50 males obviously varies from female to female. However, a very limited number of males will get hundreds or even thousands of votes, while most males will get none.

If we apply the above considerations to a small-town setting, or a setting where a particular male belongs to a highly exclusive group of men (just a few foreigners in town), it becomes clear that it will be much easier for a man to belong to the 'dream man' category.

Other ospects in the comparison of small towns and big cities:

Men everywhere seek sexual relationships. I mean: not just the sexual relationship with their wives. However, in small towns, married men have a hard time indeed to enter more sexual relationships than the one with their wives because there is not enough anonymity.

This heavily reduces the competition for those men who are not married at a particular location.

While small towns are, as a rule of thumb, better for men seeking youth and beauty, this does not necessarily mean that all forms of relationships are achieved more easily. Typicallly, traditional cultural and moral prescripts are of heavier bearing in small towns than in big cities.

In practical terms, this means that in many societies, there are, in small towns, no alternatives to marriages. Such marriages may be formal or not; but their will be some kind of a ceremony and festivity.

There are, however, countries, where it is common practice that young men and women know each other as boyfriend and girlfriend before they get married, and it is common for the two to have a sexual relationship before marriage.

Small towns in such countries can indeed be a great hunting ground for men who seek multiple sexual love relationships. (As always, sex with prostitutes is not considered.)

Part 2 of this article deals with the question in which Asian countries, small towns indeeed are the best option, and in which countries one will have to stick to big cities.

China, South Korea, Japan, Singapore, and the Philippines are obvious examples. The same is less visible for Indonesia and Thailand. Malay Malaysia (as opposed to Chinese Malaysia)is rather strict in its attitude against premarital sex.

However, any permissive attidude towards premarital sex is likely more pronounced in big cities than in small towns.

Western men who are in Asia for sexual exploits usually have a preference for big cities, especially when they are in a country for only a limited time.

But while foreigners will be more likely to score at all in a non-marital relationship in a big city, the quality of their likely sexual partners will just be so-so.

Even if they should be willing to enter a marriage, the quality of possible partners will be rather limited. The competition landscape works against anybody who is not ideal.

The above has all been rather theoretical. But it is based on practical experience.

In Germany, I did much better as a small-town newspaper editor than as a TV journalist in Munich, Germany's most fashionable town.

In Indonesia, the capital, Jakarta, is a more difficult place to date young women than most of the country. Even if a man genuinely seeks a young and beautiful Indonesian wife, his chances are worse than in other parts of the country.

In China, in the cities of Beijing, Shanghai, and Guangzhou, foreigners are not an attraction... Unlike what is the case in other cities in China. In China, were women have a fairly accurate feeling of their sexual marketvalue, foreigners will have a very hard time to net a young and definiely beautiful woman in Beijing, Shanghai, or Guangzhou, whatever their relationship goal (even if it is a formal msrriage.

The chances are much, much better in small towns, where a foreigner is a genuine attraction.

Now, don' get me wrong. Not every small town in China is an excellent option. But some are. This is while I can assure you that the girls and women you can net in the largest Chinese cities will neither be the youngest, nor the most beautiful.

In Thailand, it's a similar story. In Bangkok, you can never be sure what we get. She may be a young divorced woman with child, or even an active prostitute. In a small town, you have a serious chance to get a teenage virgin, if you are willing to enter at least a non-formal marriage.